Atakan Mahîr - “Voice of my heart”
The Internationalist Commune of Rojava remembers Atakan Mahîr, a commander of the People’s Defense Forces (HPG), who fell a martyr in Dersim countryside on August 11, 2018.
Atakan Mahîr, born 1974 in Elbîstan, joined Gerilla in Dersîm in 1993 and spent 25 years as a valuable militant in the PKK. He fought, led, produced, agitated, wrote and loved land, people and nature. He has written war history, as much as he has written he has fought, as much as he has fought he has told. One year ago on 11.08.2018 he fell in Dersîm. To write something about a human, a revolutionary like Atakan Mahîr, who some also call Gerilla of the age of the space travel or Derwêş of Dersîm is very difficult and never sufficient. Therefore we want to let him speak for himself in the following with some of his words to his beloved Dersîm, one of his poems and an excerpt from a letter about "Killing the Man".
Atakan Mahîr to Dersîm:
"They say there are some words from Seyîd Riza, but probably it comes from someone from the Demenan tribe who said after the martyrdom of his son: "We have lost the key to the mountains". Can we ever give up 3000 dead? Can we ever give up the memory of these friends? Can we ever give up our people? Can we ever give up this geography? So the oaks would grow every day, every year without us. I have years of memories, the Mûnzûr flows under me, at least we can't give it up..."
Voice of my heart
When one day
I fall, long swing
You have no scruples about my corpse
the war cry
bend down and kiss me.
How dry soil thirsts for water
tenderly as the mother stretches her hand towards the cradle
how the believing hand touches the icon
full of longing like the raindrop in the fall over the earth;
like a lover.
Suppose I were a Roma child.
like a mended bundle on the mother's back.
half naked, driven out, on a journey.
In the hand a piece of bread
just pulled out of the trash
Hands and face full of dirt
Never clean, full of longing for water
in my heart
Suppose I was a colony child.
in a great plain
slightly bent, slightly offended,
somewhat rebellious and again in the heart
Suppose I was so terribly lonely.
needed a hug.
bend over me and kiss me.
My body does not smell of roses either
like the empty ones
burned villages of Kurdistan
without children's footprints
forgotten on the sides of war.
I'm not wrapped in white silk either
in simple, naked nature
fallen for example
during the war
of my body remained you
my heart, my thought
my body like a spring leaf
a piece of face.
Have you no shyness
then bend over and kiss me
but don't cry.
Put your weapon on my head.
clench your fist in my fist.
the shine in my eye your way
my eternal peace, your hope of victory.
Say, a leaf fell from the oak tree
you record it, you smell it
maybe you'll shudder
That's what it takes, comrade!
Do not forget,
not in the age of the Messiah
in the age of space travel, we are guerrillas
neither lived Spartacus as we do
nor did Ché fight like us.
Of course, our bodies are the price
for the glad tidings of a blue sky
That's what they're for, comrade!
The reach for the sun is not only near
we've finally seized her
our finally the dawn
our song sounds long
the mountains dance in circles
our children like a mad wind
From villages sounds the crowing of the cock
the colors of our flag are tinting the clouds
not the rainbow spans Kurdistan
the new life is it
Yours is freedom, comrade!
Atakan Mahir‘s letter about „killing the Man“
"Man hasn’t been brought up in a free environment in our society, and so his personality is unstable and weak – what is reflected in his struggle for freedom, which he doesn’t regard as his main goal. In addition he uses the concept of freedom as a disguise, rather than as a culture which is reflected throughout the practices of his everyday life. When, among ourselves, we debate how far masculinity dominates our personalities, we decide that if we can’t practice [masculinity] in our tasks within the liberation movement, then we must find other ways elsewhere to practice it. This shows how male sovereignty both embarrasses men, and yet always offers them a safe haven. Every man who claims to respect women still has some point where he puts limits on them. This is because of how deep rooted male dominance is as a culture in his personality, stopping him from really being able to follow through on his claims.
Man defines both genders as opponents of each other, and regards woman simply as someone who isn’t a male. Likewise, a man is someone who is not female. In this state of antagonism both genders eliminate rather than complement each other. It means that constructing personal identity for one gender has consequences, even causing damage in the other’s personal identity. It’s known that the male personal identity has been shaped over a long time, and so prevails in such conflict. But men are unable to establish deep fellowship and comradeship among themselves. They neither reveal their sufferings nor they are open towards each other. They always put limits among themselves. Moreover, men often identify themselves with physical strength. Is it a demonstration of strength to show how they fulfill all tasks and bear heavy burdens? To show how potent they are in sexual relationships? Thinking this way means that they always need to prove themselves in front of someone.”